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caranfindelSam, I know everyone is taking this day to talk about how brave you are, how kind, how compassionate, how strong, how smart, how thoughtful. And all of these things are true. But I'm here to talk about something else.
Your fashion sense.
Or lack thereof.
This orange jacket in particular.
On the one hand, I understand how you end up with items like this, and it does fit in so well with your character. Growing up in the shadow of your gorgeous brother, you never thought of yourself as particularly attractive. Dean isn't vain, but he knows he's attractive and he dresses the part. Maybe it's for hunting reasons and maybe it's his armor against rejection and maybe it just gives his self-esteem a little lift. But you tend to wear whatever you can find, I suspect. If the sleeves are long enough, it's your style, am I right?
Would you have drawn the line here? Or would you still be wearing this jacket if it were purple?
But here's the thing, Sam. You deserve better. We, your admirers, deserve better.
I'll admit that sometimes you get it right on the nose.
Right on the fucking nose, dear boy.
But much of the time, you're obviously choosing clothing based on function alone. And I understand. The orange jacket fits close to your body, it has large pockets, it seems sturdy and warm. It works. But did you think beyond that? Did you find it in a Goodwill or a Farm and Home Supply and get as far as "it covers what needs to be covered" and then stop right there?
(Are you secretly color blind? Hmm.)
My point is, something as lovely as Sam Winchester shouldn't be wrapped in "whatever fits." And yeah, I know you won't believe me when I wax rhapsodic about your unnatural (dare I say supernatural?) beauty. I know you don't think you're the pretty half of this duo. But let me explain it to you in terms you can understand. If you were Tolkien characters, Dean would be the most handsome man in Middle Earth. And you would be an elf.
I know it's awfully forward of me to ask you for favors on your own birthday. But I also know you're the kind of person who would grant them. So please, for me, and all my like-minded friends. Fewer burnt orange jackets. More black shirts. (And if you see someone headed your way with a can of hairspray, run.)
There. That's better.
Happy birthday, Sam Winchester.
Your fashion sense.
Or lack thereof.
This orange jacket in particular.
On the one hand, I understand how you end up with items like this, and it does fit in so well with your character. Growing up in the shadow of your gorgeous brother, you never thought of yourself as particularly attractive. Dean isn't vain, but he knows he's attractive and he dresses the part. Maybe it's for hunting reasons and maybe it's his armor against rejection and maybe it just gives his self-esteem a little lift. But you tend to wear whatever you can find, I suspect. If the sleeves are long enough, it's your style, am I right?
Would you have drawn the line here? Or would you still be wearing this jacket if it were purple?
But here's the thing, Sam. You deserve better. We, your admirers, deserve better.
I'll admit that sometimes you get it right on the nose.
Right on the fucking nose, dear boy.
But much of the time, you're obviously choosing clothing based on function alone. And I understand. The orange jacket fits close to your body, it has large pockets, it seems sturdy and warm. It works. But did you think beyond that? Did you find it in a Goodwill or a Farm and Home Supply and get as far as "it covers what needs to be covered" and then stop right there?
(Are you secretly color blind? Hmm.)
My point is, something as lovely as Sam Winchester shouldn't be wrapped in "whatever fits." And yeah, I know you won't believe me when I wax rhapsodic about your unnatural (dare I say supernatural?) beauty. I know you don't think you're the pretty half of this duo. But let me explain it to you in terms you can understand. If you were Tolkien characters, Dean would be the most handsome man in Middle Earth. And you would be an elf.
I know it's awfully forward of me to ask you for favors on your own birthday. But I also know you're the kind of person who would grant them. So please, for me, and all my like-minded friends. Fewer burnt orange jackets. More black shirts. (And if you see someone headed your way with a can of hairspray, run.)
There. That's better.
Happy birthday, Sam Winchester.
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Date: 2017-05-02 06:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 06:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 06:18 pm (UTC)I still think that this is his spare jacket, the one he doesn't really like wearing but has no choice because his others are either covered in something gross that he can't wash out (yet, there will research!) or are in the washer as we speak. Maybe Dean bought it for him as a joke, and Sam wears it just to spite him! Or maybe Sam was temporarily injured when Dean bought it, and couldn't really see the colour clearly, and now that he can, he wears it on purpose!!!
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Date: 2017-05-02 06:41 pm (UTC)I love this!
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Date: 2017-05-02 08:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 08:50 pm (UTC)(I'm working on an actual fic about Sam's hoodies. Swear to chuck.)
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Date: 2017-05-03 10:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 07:46 pm (UTC)But. ALL THE LOVE IN THE WORLD for "If you were Tolkien characters, Dean would be the most handsome man in Middle Earth. And you would be an elf."
That is not only true, but is the best. analogy. ever. <3 <3 <3
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Date: 2017-05-02 08:52 pm (UTC)He's a lot less likely to wear an unfortunate plaid shirt!
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Date: 2017-05-02 09:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-06 07:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 07:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 08:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 08:15 pm (UTC)He was listening! (Preview pic from 12/20)
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Date: 2017-05-02 08:52 pm (UTC)(Sammy's wearing my birthday present!)
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Date: 2017-05-06 05:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 08:31 pm (UTC)(And I like his orange jacket a little! :D)
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Date: 2017-05-02 08:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 09:22 pm (UTC)Sammy would wear purple. Remember the purple t-shirt from season 1?
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Date: 2017-05-02 09:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 11:49 pm (UTC)Though it would be extremely hard for him to go unnoticed as a hunter -- "So who came up and beheaded this guy right in front of you? Okay, a million feet tall and wearing an eggplant jacket, got it..."
(actual headcanon is that Sam does wear pretty much whatever he can find -- they seem to raid thrift stores for their warddrobes, and guys shirts with XXL-length sleeves are probably hard to come by, especially ones that aren't circus tents on him otherwise?)
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Date: 2017-05-03 02:54 am (UTC)Love this. Happy Birthday to our magnificent Sam. Maybe Dean will get him a more flattering jacket.
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Date: 2017-05-04 10:28 pm (UTC)Personally I always felt that after Stanford and Jessica, and the deaths of his father and then brother, Sam just... slowly began to stop caring about his appearance beyond the basics. If this is what your life is going to be, why bother? In the later seasons, it's almost like he increasingly didn't want folks to look at him too closely - or to look at him and dismiss him. Most of his wardrobe indeed screams "remaindered at Walmart" or "only $2 at Goodwill". The fact that some looks good seems pure random chance.
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Date: 2017-05-06 07:25 pm (UTC)