Initial reaction 15.18: "Despair"
Nov. 6th, 2020 03:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
caranfindelFirst, let me thank those of you who posted such thoughtful, intelligent comments last week. I hate that I couldn’t jump in there with you. I love that you did it without me.
THEN: The key to Billie's library. Billie wants to become God. Cas made a deal with The Empty. Chuck absorbed Amara. Jack absorbed Adam's rib. Dean pointed a gun at Sam (DEAN POINTED A GUN AT SAM.) Chuck is pissed. Jack is going to explode.
Friends, as you know, I try not to even see the episode titles before they air, so I didn't know until last night that this one was called "Despair." But it shouldn't be a surprise that I was thrilled. I had a bad day yesterday, with things that had nothing to do with the election, and I was ready to sit down with a beer and some Winchester despair. SO READY.
NOW: We begin right where we left off last week, with Jack about to explode with God-killing power. Sam half-carries him into the map table room, Cas tells him to take deep breaths and focus, and Dean gets all panicky and is no help at all. Jack wants the guys to just leave him outside in order to minimize the damage when he goes kaboom. {Sidebar... how far away would he have to be, considering that his explosive power could kill God? Discuss.} Dean yells at Sam to find one of Rowena's spells (and oh, Sam as Rowena's apprentice; there's a plot that was sadly wasted, wasn't it?) but he's interrupted by Billie and her scythe, which she's carrying in a very obvious way. She's furious, and tells them the plan to destroy Chuck was doomed "because of you." Billie can't stop Jack's earth-shattering kaboom, "but there is something I can do." She sends him to the Empty. Empty!Meg cheerfully points out that he doesn't look so hot, but then he looks explosively hot. Ah, there's our earth-shattering kaboom!
Bunker. Billie explains that The Empty was the only option to absorb the impact of Jack the Bomb. And that he's not necessarily dead, because taking out Chuck and Amara was the part that was fatal, not actually being the bomb. Hmm. So Jack's point of no return wasn't actually a point of no return after all. It's kinda retconny, but not really? I've decided it's logical and I approve.
However, if the Empty survives, "it's gonna be pissed." Particularly at Billie. And it's very strong. Billie and Sam remind us that the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned. They do not get into the details of what constitutes a summoning, but I'm sure that isn't important. And Billie might be willing to bring Jack back, assuming he survived, but not until Sam returns what he took from her. Chuck's death book.
Sam immediately goes on the attack. He points out that she was planning to betray them from the start, leading to the deaths of all the AU refugees and everyone who was brought back from death, including him and Dean. "Even if I give you the book," he says, "what's to stop you from stabbing us in the back? Killing us all?"
"Nothing," Billie says. She gets up in Sam's face and tells him Jack won't last long. Either give her the book now, or lose him forever.
Can I just point out that Sam is still a little bloody from Dean punching him in the face? After he pointed a gun at him?
Meanwhile, in the Empty, we discover that Jack is still alive (yay) and that this episode was directed by Richard Speight (yay). He is surrounded by particles that gradually form back into Empty!Meg. And, as predicted, she's pissed.
In the bunker, Sam brings the book to Billie, but ignores her outstretched hand and slams it onto the table instead. It's a pointless little burst of defiance and I love it.
Billie flips to the end to read the new ending of God's book, "since you ruined the last one." She seems to like what she reads. Sam says "Wait, the ends of your books change? So me killing Rowena was presented as unavoidable fate but it really wasn't necessary at all?" No, he actually doesn't. But I do, on his behalf. It's a pointless little burst of defiance. Over in the Empty, Empty!Meg grabs Jack's head and says "you made it loud!" and this is a conversation I've had with my dogs in the wee dark hours of the morning more times than I can count because we just want to SLEEP, GUYS but before she can actually crush his head, Billie zaps him back to the bunker.
Billie tells the guys that Jack is hers because he's still useful. Dean responds by grabbing her scythe and swinging at her. She flings him away, but she's wounded and bleeding light. Oh, and she dropped the book. Sam and Cas ignore Dean crumpled over against the wall - Cas runs to comfort Jack, and Sam runs to pick up the book. Unfortunately, he can't open it. Dean says "hey, thanks for not helping me, guys" and Sam says "oh, I'm sorry, I guess I'm still a little rattled from you punching me in the face after you pointed a gun at me." No, he doesn't. But I do, on his behalf.
Several people have pointed out how skinny Jared looks in these last few episodes, but this is the first time I've noticed it. It will be interesting to see how he looks in the two that were filmed after their Covid shutdown.
Time jump. Dean is sitting in the library, drinking whiskey. And I've said it a million times but I'll say it again - I could watch an entire episode that was just Dean drinking. And then it gets even better when Sam walks in wearing only a v-neck t-shirt. Single layer Sam alert, guys! How long has it been? Dean slides the bottle over to him and we get a little bonus hand pron and then this happens:
Sam, I'm sorry about... everything.
Dean, you don't have to -
I pulled a gun on you. It's like I just couldn't stop. You know, we were so close to beating him. Like, I could smell Chuck's blood in the water, and I - nothing else mattered. It was everything. And I just couldn't snap out of it.
Well, you did. You've snapped me out of worse.
Hmmm. Am I missing a time when Dean snapped Sam out of something? I mean, I know in Stull, Sam was able to overcome Lucifer because of Dean. But that was Sam snapping himself out of it. And Dean convinced Sam to give up the trials, but that wasn't Sam under anything that he needed to be "snapped out of." I think if you're going to give Dean credit for snapping himself out of it when confronted by his teary eyed, bloodied little brother, you have to give Sam credit for snapping himself out of his own situations.
It doesn't matter. All that matters is these two sitting quietly in the dark, drinking whiskey together.
Dean's feeling some despair (nice) because Billie wants them dead, Jack is powerless (oh, wait, when did that happen?), and Michael isn't answering his prayers. No one is on their side. "Well, we regroup, somehow," says Sam. They drink a sad little toast to "somehow," and I die a thousand deaths.
Billie's library. Billie stalks angrily through the stacks. A reaper informs her he put up warding to keep the Empty out, and asks if the plan has changed. Yes, it has.
Elsewhere, a woman we don't know is cooking some seriously dry scrambled eggs. She thinks she knows what she's doing, because she's explaining to someone else in the room how to cook eggs so they're "not too runny, not too dry" but seriously. Gordon Ramsay would be appalled. {Sidebar: Gordon's eggs actually look a bit too runny for my taste, and my family would refuse to eat them, but this lady's dry crumbly eggs are still an abomination.} She turns around and we see AU Charlie sitting at the kitchen table. Oh, Charlie has a girlfriend! Sweet. And she must be in love, because she tells this girlfriend that they're the best eggs she's ever had. And also, she's still hunting. Guess she didn't retire to a mountaintop after all. Probably because she couldn't get wifi. Anyway. Her girlfriend's plate crashes to the floor because her girlfriend abruptly disappeared. (Aw, her name was Stevie. Stevie and Charlie. How cute is that?)
Time jump. Charlie's apartment building is called Kim Manor.
Nice.
As Sam runs the EMF meter (and there's a nice wordless conversation where Sam lets Dean know he didn't find anything), Charlie talks about how they met (thanks to AU Bobby) and how she experienced nothing when Stevie disappeared. No sulphur smell, no cold, nothing. Dean and Sam have another wordless conversation about what they think happened.
Dean and Sam explain that Billie wants to send all the AU people back to their now non-existent worlds. So Stevie was from AU World too? I guess that explains how AU Bobby knew her. Coincidentally, Sam's phone rings, and it's AU Bobby. They have an extremely short conversation in which Sam learns that another AU hunter simply vanished. And there's no explanation on Sam's end, just "yeah, I understand." So have they already talked to AU Bobby about the Billie situation? Or was Sam and Bobby's conversation literally "hey, a hunter vanished into thin air, how weird is that" and "yeah, I understand" with no further discussion? Anyway. Dean says it's open season on anyone from another world (aw, sorry, Winchesters in Brazil), anyone who came back from the dead, and Sam gets a horrified look on his face and says "Eileen."
Yikes.
Meanwhile, out by the Impala, in broad daylight, Jack tells Cas that he feels strange because the plan failed and his destiny was averted. "I was ready to die, and I wanted to - for Sam, for Dean, for the world - I wanted to make things right. And now I don't know why I'm even here." OF COURSE HE LISTED SAM FIRST. Cas tells him he didn't need absolution from anyone, and that they care about him not because of his usefulness, but just because he's him. Somewhere Dean says "um, wait." Jack is scared because he's powerless and can't protect anyone. Cas is too. So, did Jack lose his powers after the earth shattering kaboom? Or earlier, and I just wasn't paying attention?
Nighttime. Dean speeds down the road as Sam texts Eileen. I don't know where Eileen is, but she must be pretty far away from Kim Manor. Sam told her to get out of her house, go somewhere public, and wait by her car. Now, I cover the guest star credits, so I don't know if Shoshanna is in this episode. But even unspoiled, I'm pretty sure she's not going to be there when they arrive. She starts to type a response, as evidenced by the bubbles, but then stops responding. Yep, just as I thought, no one is standing by her car. Sam finds her phone on the ground, cracked as if it were dropped (like, say, by someone who disappeared while holding it) and LOOK AT HER LOCKSCREEN. LOOK AT IT.
Some will say this is just the photo that pops up when Sam texts her but they are WRONG. This is her FREAKING LOCK SCREEN, PEOPLE.
Anyway. He sees the unfinished message she was writing, which says she's by her car. Aw, Sam. Dean tries to talk to him and he says "I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now."
Aw, SAM!
Sam compartmentalizes his grief and jumps into take-care-of-everyone mode. He says they need to gather everyone together, and they need to find a location central to everyone. Well, I mean, there is one place I know of that is literally the central most point in the United States, maybe you could go there? It's supposed to be secure from all things supernatural, too. Dean says that while Sam is going that, he is going to go end what he started. OH, GOOD. I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD SPLIT UP. "We couldn't make Chuck pay, but Billie? She left her blade. Her I can kill." Hey, wouldn't be the first time. Sam agrees, Cas says he'll go with Dean, and we get a brother hug. Once again, Dean does the two things I love when he hugs Sam: 1. he puts his arms on top, as if he were still the taller brother, and b. he looks away and packs up his emotions before he lets Sam see his face after the hug. "Let's go, Cas," he says. "Let's go reap a reaper." Cas turns and follows without saying anything at all to Sam or Jack, but I'm sure that won't be an issue.
There is also a hand to the back of the neck, which is delightful, and Sam's tearful little nod.
Time jump - it's daytime. Sam's on the phone with Donna, who is standing outside her truck (but didn't she used to have a big black SUV?) at that bridge we've seen so many times. She's sending him to "the old Harmon property," which should be just what he's looking for because it has an abandoned silo. I mean, I wouldn't jump immediately to abandoned silo, but maybe there weren't any abandoned warehouses around. She says it's in Hastings, just south of her, and if you think I didn't confirm that the town of Hastings is in fact about 30 minutes south of Stillwater, Minnesota then you just don't know me at all.
Sam is at a gas station and oh, he's driving Eileen's car! That's not heartbreaking at all. I guess she didn't have her keys in her pocket when she disappeared. (Hah, like Sam Winchester needs keys.) Donna and AU Bobby are rounding up everyone they can think of. She asks what the plan is, and Sam bends down creepily to look at Jack in the passenger seat and says "I'm still working on that." I mean, I know they keep telling us Jack lost his powers, but the way Sam looks at him right here certainly suggests Jack is part of the plan, and maybe not in a good way.
Spoiler alert: seriously, why do I even bother.
Sam comes around to Jack's window and tells him he needs him to drive, because Sam needs to work on archives and spells and stuff. And is that true, or is this just "I don't expect you to live through this part so I want to let you have some time behind the wheel of Eileen's 1970 Plymouth Valiant?" (At least that's what The Husband thinks it is.)
Bunker. Enter Dean and Cas. Dean declares that if Billie isn't in her library, they'll just trash the place to "smoke her out." It's an interesting choice of words.
Foreshadowing Dean as the new Death? (Remember, I'm completely unspoiled. I know nothing.)
Silo. Let's stick to this location for now. Sam and Jack pull up and are greeted by Donna. Jack goes inside to set up the warding, and Donna gives Sam a nice hug.
I want to be there.
She tells him she's sorry about Eileen and gets one of his sad little nods that I love so much. Bobby is already here, and she name-drops Garth and Jody and the girls, saying they're on "high alert." Sam tells her they're not on Billie's list, so they should be safe. And so should Donna. Well, that's good to know. Sam's surprised to see Charlie pull up. She tells him "I just don't want this to happen to anyone else." I don't know what you think you're going to be able to do, Charlie, but okay.
Turns out the silo is actually a Tardis, so I guess maybe it was a good choice. It's huge on the inside, and is also more finished than any silo I've ever been in (which is, okay, one silo, but still.) The interior is already heavily warded. Several people are milling about. {Sidebar: How many hunters were away from the bunker when Michael attacked, and why have none of them returned?} Bobby tells Sam that as soon as the hunters heard he wanted them there, they came running. "Whether you like it or not, you're the big man here." Hey, I wonder if the guy who called him Chief is here. Bobby, being a man after my own heart, is mostly concerned about the bathroom situation. Sam hopes they won't be there long enough for it to be an issue. He has a spell from Rowena (!) that should boost the strength of the wards, but that's all he has. Bobby doesn't look very reassured, and glances in a foreshadowy way at a family with kids. Sam looks around at all of these people he feels responsible for and takes a deep breath and oh, my heart.
Donna and Jack are painting more wards. Jack bends down to look at a plant, and Donna comes up to him and says "I'm no expert on this hoodoo stuff, but best we patch that up, yeah?" and I don't know what the hell she's talking about. What is this plant disturbing? Jack reaches out to touch the plant and it withers away as his hand gets close. Friends, I'm pretty sure this is a bad sign. Jack is too. He stares at his hand, and if he'd been watching a few seasons ago, he would have noticed that plants did the same thing when Amara touched them. Coincidence???
Later we see everyone watch as Sam recites the spell. (Yes, it's hot. Do you even have to ask?) The sigils glow red briefly and then fade, and the music turns ominous and I think this means his boost failed. But I guess not, because Sam says now they wait. But they don't have to wait long, because suddenly one of the children dissolves into smoke. One by one, all of the AU people dissolve like they've been snapped by Thanos. Charlie runs up to Sam and says "Sam, what do we do" just like Maggie did, and just like Maggie she's taken out immediately. Sam watches in horror as AU Bobby smokes out. He turns to Donna, who says "Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good," and then Donna is gone! Crap! Jack and Sam are left staring at the empty-except-for-them silo.
One more serving of despair, coming right up.
On to the other side.
Dean enters Billie's library, brandishing the scythe. Cas follows, bearing only a hangdog expression. Dean motions for him to go one direction and Dean goes the other, soon finding Billie. He thinks he's sneaking up behind her, but she says "So, I guess this is the part where I say hello boys. Hello, boys." Oh, I was wrong; Cas has his angel blade. Billie snarks about Dean's bad aim, and he says he wasn't trying to kill her then (which seems like a lie), but he is now, because of what she's doing to his people. Billie slams him against the wall again. She chokes Cas Darth Vader-style from a distance, and then the old fashioned way. "Remember when you stabbed me in the back?" she says. "Because I do." Oh, that's funny, because earlier Sam said she was going to stab them in the back. She should have said "like you stabbed me?" Dean comes to the rescue by poking her with the blunt end of the scythe rather than the pointy end, so maybe she was right about his bad aim. Then he gets the blade against her throat (but still not the sharp end, just the back) and demands that she stop killing his friends. She says she didn't - it was Chuck. And Dean's wasting time.
I'm considering it time well spent, because it looks so nice.
Billie tells Dean the injury he gave her earlier is something she can't recover from - she's going to die. She pulls away her coat to show him a nasty festering wound, and I wonder why something so physical would kill her, but. Eh. She tells him she doesn't care about his friends or family. "But seeing you here has reminded me of something. There is one thing I'd like. One wish before I go. I'd like to see you dead." She grabs her scythe back, flings the boys around, and slowly stalks toward them. Dean and Cas rush through the door back into the bunker.
Dean is panicky again, trying to figure out what to do next. He's suddenly struck down by chest pain, and I expect to see someone sticking a knife (or a scythe) in his back, but it's actually Billie doing it Darth Vader-style again. Cas drags him away as Billie monologues. "It's you, Dean; it's always been you. Death-defying. Rule-breaking. You are everything I lived to set right. To put down. To tame. You are human disorder incarnate." Yeah, we know, Dean's awesome. We get this speech every season. Cas and Dean fleeing through the halls of the bunker, as Billie calmly follows with a weapon, is (once again) reminding me of better, older episodes. She drags the blade against the wall, which is pretty cool. "Don't you think it's finally time?" she calls. "Time for the sweet release of death?" Too bad she's not chasing Sam, because 1. Sam being chased through the halls of the bunker YES ALWAYS PLEASE AND THANK YOU and b. Sam would probably at least stop to consider the sweet release of death.
Cas and Dean end up in the dungeon storeroom. Cas gets Dean's knife out of his pocket and cuts his own hand to paint a sigil on the door. It looks like an angel banishing sigil, but apparently it block's Billie's power. Not permanently, though, because it fades as she pounds on the door. Cas says that since the wound is killing her, they just have to wait her out.
Yeah, and if we can't?
Then we fight.
We'll lose. I just led us into another trap. All because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry, and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do.
Dean.
It was Chuck all along. We never should have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them now.
Yes you should, Dean, you really really should. Dean is practically drowning in despair, which, you know. Is a good thing. 10/10 would recommend. "She's gonna get through that door," he tells Cas. "And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me. I'm sorry."
"Wait, there is one thing she's afraid of," Cas says. "There's one thing strong enough to stop her." He tells Dean about the deal he made to save Jack in the Empty.
Friends, I'm going to do you a favor. If you haven't seen the episode, and aren't planning to watch the episode (yeah, I'm looking at you,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
cuddyclothes), I want you to read this paragraph and then skip down until you see the pretty pictures of Dean. And start reading after those pictures. Trust me. So, Cas summons the Empty just as Billie breaks down the door. The Empty kills Billie, but she also takes Cas. Dean is saved but Cas is gone.
{Sigh. Can I skip this part? No, I owe it to you.}
Cas explains that the Empty was going to come snatch him away as soon as he experienced a moment of true happiness. But happiness isn't having, happiness is knowing. And Dean is wonderful and "Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love." You just threatened to shoot your little brother for love, for example. Cas is teary eyed and Dean looks confused as hell and I pause the TV and turn to The Husband and we have this conversation:
I don't think I can watch this.
Why, because it's so sappy?
No, because I think they're going to kiss.
What? Why would they kiss? Is there something I'm missing?
Because part of the fandom WANTS them to kiss, and there's this group of fans that are super obnoxious about it, and they harass the actors and the writers and I think now the show thinks EVERYBODY wants them to kiss. Even though the guy who plays Dean* says it would never happen. Because I know he wasn't happy about the way the show ended, and I'm afraid this is why he wasn't happy.
...
I don't think they're gonna kiss.
If they do, I'm done.
*The Husband is not on a first name basis with Jensen.
So, let me point out that The Husband, who watches this show the way a normal human being watches a show (i.e., doesn't interact with the fandom at all), had absolutely NO expectation that they would kiss. Anyway, with some trepidation, I push play again. And Cas is still going. Dean is the most caring, selfless, loving human being on earth (OH GOD MAKE IT STOP) and knowing him has changed Cas.
Why does this sound like a goodbye?
Because it is. I love you.
Don't do this, Cas.
We see a black blob materialize behind Dean, because even though the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned, there it is. And I could argue about whether Cas being happy actually summoned the damn thing but I've already lost the will to live, so instead I'm going to describe to you how I watched in horror, with my finger hovering over the pause button, as Cas reached out to Dean and put his hand on his shoulder. But he just pushed him out of the way. Thank you baby Jesus. Billie breaks the door down as the Empty slurps into the dungeon. It surrounds Cas and Billie and sucks them into its depths. Dean is left alone. Oh, and he has a bloody palm print on his jacket from Cas grabbing his shoulder. I guess someone did watch a little bit of older seasons after all. Hard to tell sometimes.
I mean, at least he looked good, right?
Back at the silo. I've decided it must be mostly underground and isn't a grain silo like I thought. So what kind of silo do Yankees have that's mostly underground? Anyway. Jack and Sam emerge, having failed catastrophically at their mission. Sam is trying to call Dean, who isn't answering. He looks mildly panicky. "Sam?" Jack says, a little shaky. "Was it just them?"
OH CRAP. I didn't even think of that possibility.
"I don't know," Sam says, also shaky. And as we see an empty gas station and playground, it really looks like it wasn't just them at all. Sam and Jack look at each other, alone and terrified. And back in the bunker's dungeon, Dean's phone rings. It's Sam. He doesn't answer.
Despair!
So. You know how sometimes something really good will happen in an episode? And I'll say, no matter how bad this episode is, this 90 seconds makes it worth it? Well, sometimes the opposite happens. Sometimes you get a two or three minute scene - a horribly written, badly acted scene - and it's so awful that it ruins an episode. A season. A show. I'm angry that the showrunners pandered to a small, noisy minority of fans to throw something into the show that most fans didn't want and didn't help the story at all. I'm annoyed that, once again, Dean is put up on an embarrassingly overwrought pedestal. I'm kind of amused that they did this in the worst way possible. Cas's love was unrequited (unless they screw that up in the next episode), Misha's acting caused so much secondhand embarrassment that I had a hard time watching again, and from what I see on Tumblr, half of the Destihellers are furious because "Dean is a homophobe." Which is bullshit. Not returning someone's romantic affection isn't homophobia. It's consent. (I know... on this show? Ha ha.)
{Sidebar: If "Destiel" means the characters have mutual feelings for each other, doesn't this mean Destiel is not, in fact, canon? I mean, it was already so badly written that one could argue Cas wasn't proclaiming romantic love, but just a life-changing experience thanks to one human. Discuss.}
But I need to stop thinking about it. I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now.
And this wasn't even the Buckleming episode, friends. There is probably a Buckleming episode left.
I got so distracted by this nonsense that I almost forgot to talk about the Jack situation. So here's how I feel about that. I love Jack as a character. I love him as someone the Winchesters could lose (Basically, someone to stuff in the fridge? Why not.) But I don't want him to be one of them. I don't want Jack's story to be treated as if it were as important as the Winchester's story. Just like I didn't want Cas to have his own plots. I want it always, always to come down to Sam and Dean.
Anyway, I'm sure I'll have more to say. But for right now, all I'm saying is this: I pledge to stick with this show, to stick with fanworks, no matter how badly they fuck up the landing. But guys, you don't have to try so hard to fuck it up.
Two to go. As always, please don't put spoilers in the comments, including casting info and episode titles.
THEN: The key to Billie's library. Billie wants to become God. Cas made a deal with The Empty. Chuck absorbed Amara. Jack absorbed Adam's rib. Dean pointed a gun at Sam (DEAN POINTED A GUN AT SAM.) Chuck is pissed. Jack is going to explode.
Friends, as you know, I try not to even see the episode titles before they air, so I didn't know until last night that this one was called "Despair." But it shouldn't be a surprise that I was thrilled. I had a bad day yesterday, with things that had nothing to do with the election, and I was ready to sit down with a beer and some Winchester despair. SO READY.
NOW: We begin right where we left off last week, with Jack about to explode with God-killing power. Sam half-carries him into the map table room, Cas tells him to take deep breaths and focus, and Dean gets all panicky and is no help at all. Jack wants the guys to just leave him outside in order to minimize the damage when he goes kaboom. {Sidebar... how far away would he have to be, considering that his explosive power could kill God? Discuss.} Dean yells at Sam to find one of Rowena's spells (and oh, Sam as Rowena's apprentice; there's a plot that was sadly wasted, wasn't it?) but he's interrupted by Billie and her scythe, which she's carrying in a very obvious way. She's furious, and tells them the plan to destroy Chuck was doomed "because of you." Billie can't stop Jack's earth-shattering kaboom, "but there is something I can do." She sends him to the Empty. Empty!Meg cheerfully points out that he doesn't look so hot, but then he looks explosively hot. Ah, there's our earth-shattering kaboom!
Bunker. Billie explains that The Empty was the only option to absorb the impact of Jack the Bomb. And that he's not necessarily dead, because taking out Chuck and Amara was the part that was fatal, not actually being the bomb. Hmm. So Jack's point of no return wasn't actually a point of no return after all. It's kinda retconny, but not really? I've decided it's logical and I approve.
However, if the Empty survives, "it's gonna be pissed." Particularly at Billie. And it's very strong. Billie and Sam remind us that the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned. They do not get into the details of what constitutes a summoning, but I'm sure that isn't important. And Billie might be willing to bring Jack back, assuming he survived, but not until Sam returns what he took from her. Chuck's death book.
Sam immediately goes on the attack. He points out that she was planning to betray them from the start, leading to the deaths of all the AU refugees and everyone who was brought back from death, including him and Dean. "Even if I give you the book," he says, "what's to stop you from stabbing us in the back? Killing us all?"
"Nothing," Billie says. She gets up in Sam's face and tells him Jack won't last long. Either give her the book now, or lose him forever.
Can I just point out that Sam is still a little bloody from Dean punching him in the face? After he pointed a gun at him?
Meanwhile, in the Empty, we discover that Jack is still alive (yay) and that this episode was directed by Richard Speight (yay). He is surrounded by particles that gradually form back into Empty!Meg. And, as predicted, she's pissed.
In the bunker, Sam brings the book to Billie, but ignores her outstretched hand and slams it onto the table instead. It's a pointless little burst of defiance and I love it.
Billie flips to the end to read the new ending of God's book, "since you ruined the last one." She seems to like what she reads. Sam says "Wait, the ends of your books change? So me killing Rowena was presented as unavoidable fate but it really wasn't necessary at all?" No, he actually doesn't. But I do, on his behalf. It's a pointless little burst of defiance. Over in the Empty, Empty!Meg grabs Jack's head and says "you made it loud!" and this is a conversation I've had with my dogs in the wee dark hours of the morning more times than I can count because we just want to SLEEP, GUYS but before she can actually crush his head, Billie zaps him back to the bunker.
Billie tells the guys that Jack is hers because he's still useful. Dean responds by grabbing her scythe and swinging at her. She flings him away, but she's wounded and bleeding light. Oh, and she dropped the book. Sam and Cas ignore Dean crumpled over against the wall - Cas runs to comfort Jack, and Sam runs to pick up the book. Unfortunately, he can't open it. Dean says "hey, thanks for not helping me, guys" and Sam says "oh, I'm sorry, I guess I'm still a little rattled from you punching me in the face after you pointed a gun at me." No, he doesn't. But I do, on his behalf.
Several people have pointed out how skinny Jared looks in these last few episodes, but this is the first time I've noticed it. It will be interesting to see how he looks in the two that were filmed after their Covid shutdown.
Time jump. Dean is sitting in the library, drinking whiskey. And I've said it a million times but I'll say it again - I could watch an entire episode that was just Dean drinking. And then it gets even better when Sam walks in wearing only a v-neck t-shirt. Single layer Sam alert, guys! How long has it been? Dean slides the bottle over to him and we get a little bonus hand pron and then this happens:
Sam, I'm sorry about... everything.
Dean, you don't have to -
I pulled a gun on you. It's like I just couldn't stop. You know, we were so close to beating him. Like, I could smell Chuck's blood in the water, and I - nothing else mattered. It was everything. And I just couldn't snap out of it.
Well, you did. You've snapped me out of worse.
Hmmm. Am I missing a time when Dean snapped Sam out of something? I mean, I know in Stull, Sam was able to overcome Lucifer because of Dean. But that was Sam snapping himself out of it. And Dean convinced Sam to give up the trials, but that wasn't Sam under anything that he needed to be "snapped out of." I think if you're going to give Dean credit for snapping himself out of it when confronted by his teary eyed, bloodied little brother, you have to give Sam credit for snapping himself out of his own situations.
It doesn't matter. All that matters is these two sitting quietly in the dark, drinking whiskey together.
Dean's feeling some despair (nice) because Billie wants them dead, Jack is powerless (oh, wait, when did that happen?), and Michael isn't answering his prayers. No one is on their side. "Well, we regroup, somehow," says Sam. They drink a sad little toast to "somehow," and I die a thousand deaths.
Billie's library. Billie stalks angrily through the stacks. A reaper informs her he put up warding to keep the Empty out, and asks if the plan has changed. Yes, it has.
Elsewhere, a woman we don't know is cooking some seriously dry scrambled eggs. She thinks she knows what she's doing, because she's explaining to someone else in the room how to cook eggs so they're "not too runny, not too dry" but seriously. Gordon Ramsay would be appalled. {Sidebar: Gordon's eggs actually look a bit too runny for my taste, and my family would refuse to eat them, but this lady's dry crumbly eggs are still an abomination.} She turns around and we see AU Charlie sitting at the kitchen table. Oh, Charlie has a girlfriend! Sweet. And she must be in love, because she tells this girlfriend that they're the best eggs she's ever had. And also, she's still hunting. Guess she didn't retire to a mountaintop after all. Probably because she couldn't get wifi. Anyway. Her girlfriend's plate crashes to the floor because her girlfriend abruptly disappeared. (Aw, her name was Stevie. Stevie and Charlie. How cute is that?)
Time jump. Charlie's apartment building is called Kim Manor.
Nice.
As Sam runs the EMF meter (and there's a nice wordless conversation where Sam lets Dean know he didn't find anything), Charlie talks about how they met (thanks to AU Bobby) and how she experienced nothing when Stevie disappeared. No sulphur smell, no cold, nothing. Dean and Sam have another wordless conversation about what they think happened.
Dean and Sam explain that Billie wants to send all the AU people back to their now non-existent worlds. So Stevie was from AU World too? I guess that explains how AU Bobby knew her. Coincidentally, Sam's phone rings, and it's AU Bobby. They have an extremely short conversation in which Sam learns that another AU hunter simply vanished. And there's no explanation on Sam's end, just "yeah, I understand." So have they already talked to AU Bobby about the Billie situation? Or was Sam and Bobby's conversation literally "hey, a hunter vanished into thin air, how weird is that" and "yeah, I understand" with no further discussion? Anyway. Dean says it's open season on anyone from another world (aw, sorry, Winchesters in Brazil), anyone who came back from the dead, and Sam gets a horrified look on his face and says "Eileen."
Yikes.
Meanwhile, out by the Impala, in broad daylight, Jack tells Cas that he feels strange because the plan failed and his destiny was averted. "I was ready to die, and I wanted to - for Sam, for Dean, for the world - I wanted to make things right. And now I don't know why I'm even here." OF COURSE HE LISTED SAM FIRST. Cas tells him he didn't need absolution from anyone, and that they care about him not because of his usefulness, but just because he's him. Somewhere Dean says "um, wait." Jack is scared because he's powerless and can't protect anyone. Cas is too. So, did Jack lose his powers after the earth shattering kaboom? Or earlier, and I just wasn't paying attention?
Nighttime. Dean speeds down the road as Sam texts Eileen. I don't know where Eileen is, but she must be pretty far away from Kim Manor. Sam told her to get out of her house, go somewhere public, and wait by her car. Now, I cover the guest star credits, so I don't know if Shoshanna is in this episode. But even unspoiled, I'm pretty sure she's not going to be there when they arrive. She starts to type a response, as evidenced by the bubbles, but then stops responding. Yep, just as I thought, no one is standing by her car. Sam finds her phone on the ground, cracked as if it were dropped (like, say, by someone who disappeared while holding it) and LOOK AT HER LOCKSCREEN. LOOK AT IT.
Some will say this is just the photo that pops up when Sam texts her but they are WRONG. This is her FREAKING LOCK SCREEN, PEOPLE.
Anyway. He sees the unfinished message she was writing, which says she's by her car. Aw, Sam. Dean tries to talk to him and he says "I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now."
Aw, SAM!
Sam compartmentalizes his grief and jumps into take-care-of-everyone mode. He says they need to gather everyone together, and they need to find a location central to everyone. Well, I mean, there is one place I know of that is literally the central most point in the United States, maybe you could go there? It's supposed to be secure from all things supernatural, too. Dean says that while Sam is going that, he is going to go end what he started. OH, GOOD. I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD SPLIT UP. "We couldn't make Chuck pay, but Billie? She left her blade. Her I can kill." Hey, wouldn't be the first time. Sam agrees, Cas says he'll go with Dean, and we get a brother hug. Once again, Dean does the two things I love when he hugs Sam: 1. he puts his arms on top, as if he were still the taller brother, and b. he looks away and packs up his emotions before he lets Sam see his face after the hug. "Let's go, Cas," he says. "Let's go reap a reaper." Cas turns and follows without saying anything at all to Sam or Jack, but I'm sure that won't be an issue.
There is also a hand to the back of the neck, which is delightful, and Sam's tearful little nod.
Time jump - it's daytime. Sam's on the phone with Donna, who is standing outside her truck (but didn't she used to have a big black SUV?) at that bridge we've seen so many times. She's sending him to "the old Harmon property," which should be just what he's looking for because it has an abandoned silo. I mean, I wouldn't jump immediately to abandoned silo, but maybe there weren't any abandoned warehouses around. She says it's in Hastings, just south of her, and if you think I didn't confirm that the town of Hastings is in fact about 30 minutes south of Stillwater, Minnesota then you just don't know me at all.
Sam is at a gas station and oh, he's driving Eileen's car! That's not heartbreaking at all. I guess she didn't have her keys in her pocket when she disappeared. (Hah, like Sam Winchester needs keys.) Donna and AU Bobby are rounding up everyone they can think of. She asks what the plan is, and Sam bends down creepily to look at Jack in the passenger seat and says "I'm still working on that." I mean, I know they keep telling us Jack lost his powers, but the way Sam looks at him right here certainly suggests Jack is part of the plan, and maybe not in a good way.
Spoiler alert: seriously, why do I even bother.
Sam comes around to Jack's window and tells him he needs him to drive, because Sam needs to work on archives and spells and stuff. And is that true, or is this just "I don't expect you to live through this part so I want to let you have some time behind the wheel of Eileen's 1970 Plymouth Valiant?" (At least that's what The Husband thinks it is.)
Bunker. Enter Dean and Cas. Dean declares that if Billie isn't in her library, they'll just trash the place to "smoke her out." It's an interesting choice of words.
Foreshadowing Dean as the new Death? (Remember, I'm completely unspoiled. I know nothing.)
Silo. Let's stick to this location for now. Sam and Jack pull up and are greeted by Donna. Jack goes inside to set up the warding, and Donna gives Sam a nice hug.
I want to be there.
She tells him she's sorry about Eileen and gets one of his sad little nods that I love so much. Bobby is already here, and she name-drops Garth and Jody and the girls, saying they're on "high alert." Sam tells her they're not on Billie's list, so they should be safe. And so should Donna. Well, that's good to know. Sam's surprised to see Charlie pull up. She tells him "I just don't want this to happen to anyone else." I don't know what you think you're going to be able to do, Charlie, but okay.
Turns out the silo is actually a Tardis, so I guess maybe it was a good choice. It's huge on the inside, and is also more finished than any silo I've ever been in (which is, okay, one silo, but still.) The interior is already heavily warded. Several people are milling about. {Sidebar: How many hunters were away from the bunker when Michael attacked, and why have none of them returned?} Bobby tells Sam that as soon as the hunters heard he wanted them there, they came running. "Whether you like it or not, you're the big man here." Hey, I wonder if the guy who called him Chief is here. Bobby, being a man after my own heart, is mostly concerned about the bathroom situation. Sam hopes they won't be there long enough for it to be an issue. He has a spell from Rowena (!) that should boost the strength of the wards, but that's all he has. Bobby doesn't look very reassured, and glances in a foreshadowy way at a family with kids. Sam looks around at all of these people he feels responsible for and takes a deep breath and oh, my heart.
Donna and Jack are painting more wards. Jack bends down to look at a plant, and Donna comes up to him and says "I'm no expert on this hoodoo stuff, but best we patch that up, yeah?" and I don't know what the hell she's talking about. What is this plant disturbing? Jack reaches out to touch the plant and it withers away as his hand gets close. Friends, I'm pretty sure this is a bad sign. Jack is too. He stares at his hand, and if he'd been watching a few seasons ago, he would have noticed that plants did the same thing when Amara touched them. Coincidence???
Later we see everyone watch as Sam recites the spell. (Yes, it's hot. Do you even have to ask?) The sigils glow red briefly and then fade, and the music turns ominous and I think this means his boost failed. But I guess not, because Sam says now they wait. But they don't have to wait long, because suddenly one of the children dissolves into smoke. One by one, all of the AU people dissolve like they've been snapped by Thanos. Charlie runs up to Sam and says "Sam, what do we do" just like Maggie did, and just like Maggie she's taken out immediately. Sam watches in horror as AU Bobby smokes out. He turns to Donna, who says "Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good," and then Donna is gone! Crap! Jack and Sam are left staring at the empty-except-for-them silo.
One more serving of despair, coming right up.
On to the other side.
Dean enters Billie's library, brandishing the scythe. Cas follows, bearing only a hangdog expression. Dean motions for him to go one direction and Dean goes the other, soon finding Billie. He thinks he's sneaking up behind her, but she says "So, I guess this is the part where I say hello boys. Hello, boys." Oh, I was wrong; Cas has his angel blade. Billie snarks about Dean's bad aim, and he says he wasn't trying to kill her then (which seems like a lie), but he is now, because of what she's doing to his people. Billie slams him against the wall again. She chokes Cas Darth Vader-style from a distance, and then the old fashioned way. "Remember when you stabbed me in the back?" she says. "Because I do." Oh, that's funny, because earlier Sam said she was going to stab them in the back. She should have said "like you stabbed me?" Dean comes to the rescue by poking her with the blunt end of the scythe rather than the pointy end, so maybe she was right about his bad aim. Then he gets the blade against her throat (but still not the sharp end, just the back) and demands that she stop killing his friends. She says she didn't - it was Chuck. And Dean's wasting time.
I'm considering it time well spent, because it looks so nice.
Billie tells Dean the injury he gave her earlier is something she can't recover from - she's going to die. She pulls away her coat to show him a nasty festering wound, and I wonder why something so physical would kill her, but. Eh. She tells him she doesn't care about his friends or family. "But seeing you here has reminded me of something. There is one thing I'd like. One wish before I go. I'd like to see you dead." She grabs her scythe back, flings the boys around, and slowly stalks toward them. Dean and Cas rush through the door back into the bunker.
Dean is panicky again, trying to figure out what to do next. He's suddenly struck down by chest pain, and I expect to see someone sticking a knife (or a scythe) in his back, but it's actually Billie doing it Darth Vader-style again. Cas drags him away as Billie monologues. "It's you, Dean; it's always been you. Death-defying. Rule-breaking. You are everything I lived to set right. To put down. To tame. You are human disorder incarnate." Yeah, we know, Dean's awesome. We get this speech every season. Cas and Dean fleeing through the halls of the bunker, as Billie calmly follows with a weapon, is (once again) reminding me of better, older episodes. She drags the blade against the wall, which is pretty cool. "Don't you think it's finally time?" she calls. "Time for the sweet release of death?" Too bad she's not chasing Sam, because 1. Sam being chased through the halls of the bunker YES ALWAYS PLEASE AND THANK YOU and b. Sam would probably at least stop to consider the sweet release of death.
Cas and Dean end up in the dungeon storeroom. Cas gets Dean's knife out of his pocket and cuts his own hand to paint a sigil on the door. It looks like an angel banishing sigil, but apparently it block's Billie's power. Not permanently, though, because it fades as she pounds on the door. Cas says that since the wound is killing her, they just have to wait her out.
Yeah, and if we can't?
Then we fight.
We'll lose. I just led us into another trap. All because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry, and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do.
Dean.
It was Chuck all along. We never should have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them now.
Yes you should, Dean, you really really should. Dean is practically drowning in despair, which, you know. Is a good thing. 10/10 would recommend. "She's gonna get through that door," he tells Cas. "And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me. I'm sorry."
"Wait, there is one thing she's afraid of," Cas says. "There's one thing strong enough to stop her." He tells Dean about the deal he made to save Jack in the Empty.
Friends, I'm going to do you a favor. If you haven't seen the episode, and aren't planning to watch the episode (yeah, I'm looking at you,
cuddyclothes), I want you to read this paragraph and then skip down until you see the pretty pictures of Dean. And start reading after those pictures. Trust me. So, Cas summons the Empty just as Billie breaks down the door. The Empty kills Billie, but she also takes Cas. Dean is saved but Cas is gone.{Sigh. Can I skip this part? No, I owe it to you.}
Cas explains that the Empty was going to come snatch him away as soon as he experienced a moment of true happiness. But happiness isn't having, happiness is knowing. And Dean is wonderful and "Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love." You just threatened to shoot your little brother for love, for example. Cas is teary eyed and Dean looks confused as hell and I pause the TV and turn to The Husband and we have this conversation:
I don't think I can watch this.
Why, because it's so sappy?
No, because I think they're going to kiss.
What? Why would they kiss? Is there something I'm missing?
Because part of the fandom WANTS them to kiss, and there's this group of fans that are super obnoxious about it, and they harass the actors and the writers and I think now the show thinks EVERYBODY wants them to kiss. Even though the guy who plays Dean* says it would never happen. Because I know he wasn't happy about the way the show ended, and I'm afraid this is why he wasn't happy.
...
I don't think they're gonna kiss.
If they do, I'm done.
*The Husband is not on a first name basis with Jensen.
So, let me point out that The Husband, who watches this show the way a normal human being watches a show (i.e., doesn't interact with the fandom at all), had absolutely NO expectation that they would kiss. Anyway, with some trepidation, I push play again. And Cas is still going. Dean is the most caring, selfless, loving human being on earth (OH GOD MAKE IT STOP) and knowing him has changed Cas.
Why does this sound like a goodbye?
Because it is. I love you.
Don't do this, Cas.
We see a black blob materialize behind Dean, because even though the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned, there it is. And I could argue about whether Cas being happy actually summoned the damn thing but I've already lost the will to live, so instead I'm going to describe to you how I watched in horror, with my finger hovering over the pause button, as Cas reached out to Dean and put his hand on his shoulder. But he just pushed him out of the way. Thank you baby Jesus. Billie breaks the door down as the Empty slurps into the dungeon. It surrounds Cas and Billie and sucks them into its depths. Dean is left alone. Oh, and he has a bloody palm print on his jacket from Cas grabbing his shoulder. I guess someone did watch a little bit of older seasons after all. Hard to tell sometimes.
I mean, at least he looked good, right?
Back at the silo. I've decided it must be mostly underground and isn't a grain silo like I thought. So what kind of silo do Yankees have that's mostly underground? Anyway. Jack and Sam emerge, having failed catastrophically at their mission. Sam is trying to call Dean, who isn't answering. He looks mildly panicky. "Sam?" Jack says, a little shaky. "Was it just them?"
OH CRAP. I didn't even think of that possibility.
"I don't know," Sam says, also shaky. And as we see an empty gas station and playground, it really looks like it wasn't just them at all. Sam and Jack look at each other, alone and terrified. And back in the bunker's dungeon, Dean's phone rings. It's Sam. He doesn't answer.
Despair!
So. You know how sometimes something really good will happen in an episode? And I'll say, no matter how bad this episode is, this 90 seconds makes it worth it? Well, sometimes the opposite happens. Sometimes you get a two or three minute scene - a horribly written, badly acted scene - and it's so awful that it ruins an episode. A season. A show. I'm angry that the showrunners pandered to a small, noisy minority of fans to throw something into the show that most fans didn't want and didn't help the story at all. I'm annoyed that, once again, Dean is put up on an embarrassingly overwrought pedestal. I'm kind of amused that they did this in the worst way possible. Cas's love was unrequited (unless they screw that up in the next episode), Misha's acting caused so much secondhand embarrassment that I had a hard time watching again, and from what I see on Tumblr, half of the Destihellers are furious because "Dean is a homophobe." Which is bullshit. Not returning someone's romantic affection isn't homophobia. It's consent. (I know... on this show? Ha ha.)
{Sidebar: If "Destiel" means the characters have mutual feelings for each other, doesn't this mean Destiel is not, in fact, canon? I mean, it was already so badly written that one could argue Cas wasn't proclaiming romantic love, but just a life-changing experience thanks to one human. Discuss.}
But I need to stop thinking about it. I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now.
And this wasn't even the Buckleming episode, friends. There is probably a Buckleming episode left.
I got so distracted by this nonsense that I almost forgot to talk about the Jack situation. So here's how I feel about that. I love Jack as a character. I love him as someone the Winchesters could lose (Basically, someone to stuff in the fridge? Why not.) But I don't want him to be one of them. I don't want Jack's story to be treated as if it were as important as the Winchester's story. Just like I didn't want Cas to have his own plots. I want it always, always to come down to Sam and Dean.
Anyway, I'm sure I'll have more to say. But for right now, all I'm saying is this: I pledge to stick with this show, to stick with fanworks, no matter how badly they fuck up the landing. But guys, you don't have to try so hard to fuck it up.
Two to go. As always, please don't put spoilers in the comments, including casting info and episode titles.
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no subject
Date: 2020-11-06 11:19 pm (UTC)And yeah, Destiel ain't canon if it's unrequited. Poor Dean kinda looked shellshocked. I wanna know what he's gonna say to Sam about that last conversation. Snort. I hope next week is Jack's last episode. (You KNOW a show is on its last legs when they add a child - and then they have to age the child up super fast ).
As far as Eileen's car keys - wasn't there a bag lying on the ground along with her phone? I figured the keys were in the purse.
And I figured the 'snapping Sam out of it' stuff referred to the hallucinations Sam had after coming back from hell.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 12:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 01:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 12:27 am (UTC)Learn more about LiveJournal Ratings in FAQ (https://www.dreamwidth.org/support/faqbrowse?faqid=303).
no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 02:18 am (UTC)I will add that the the worst fallout of Sera Gamble losing control of the show in season 7 was that Bob Singer was determined to bring back Cas. I am absolutely certain that Gamble intended Cas's death to be permanent. I don't think the show ever found a way to use the character after season 6.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 01:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 02:09 pm (UTC)Jensen, at least, did make fun of the giving back of the coat scene. Frankly, he had already stated that KEEPING the darned coat was an acting choice on his part and not in the script. I think Gamble had very few effs left to give, so she decided to let Jensen's acting choice come back and play out in a way Jensen didn't care for.
I'm weird, I liked Gamble's seasons. I think season six works really well in retrospect once you know Sam doesn't have his soul. Season 7 is a mess, but she didn't have the budget to so what she wanted with the storyline and Singer had gotten a lot of input, so I don't know how it would have shaped up if she had been in complete control. Certainly now she has had two hits (The Magicians and You) and is doing well in that regard. So whatever her weaknesses she has overcome them.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 02:54 pm (UTC)I personally love S6, and there were things I liked about S7, like Frank. (I know X-Files Lone Gunmen clone, but fun, and so much early SPN was X-Files inspired.) I think that sort of change of horses midstream was part of its weakness. I’d love to know what Gamble had planned.
While I had high hopes for Carver, I couldn’t have been more disappointed. I’ve never enjoyed the show as much as I did since S6.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-10 06:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-11 12:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 05:49 am (UTC)uuhgghhhh yes please. a whole episode of this, in their undershorts.
I would love to know if Jensen has watched that scene, it was filmed really strangely, and no long shots, as though parts were cut, or added later?
I don't know, but i don't think Jensen will be happy with the acting.
I though Misha did a pretty good job, i just wished there had been a slow build up of longing looks from Cas or something. The last few years, he has been all about Jack and now byeeeee.
I want to be there
me toooo. it would be heaven.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 05:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-10 06:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 09:55 am (UTC)Destiel is not canon, but Castiel being in love with Dean is, and honestly? That makes sense for his character. Also, I think Bobo being gay plays into it. Castiel's happiness comes not from getting his man, but coming out of the closet and accepting his true self. It's all about identity.
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Date: 2020-11-10 06:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-07 11:27 pm (UTC)Always and forever love your reactions!
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Date: 2020-11-10 06:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-14 01:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-08 07:15 am (UTC)I think it could have worked if it have been from the point of view that Sam and Dean had made Castiel understand what it was to be FAMILY, and his greatest joy after all his millieu of watching and not interacting with man, was now being in the right place to be able to sacrifice himself to save his family, his brothers in arms. I think there could have been a lot of very earnest emotions there.
I wish they would have gone this way.
Instead of being moved by Cas' speech in order to feel bad when the Empty got him, when he said he realized he couldn't have what he wanted and was crying my mind stopped watching the episode and started thinking about fandom instead: "Are they going to kiss? Wow, the Destielers are going to be over the moon! Gee, they tried to write that speech to be interpreted either way, but the Destielers are going to claim they won..." and so I didn't feel anything when the Empty snatched him instead of being all broken up.
I felt the worst when Donna disappeared.
And Dean, ANSWER YOUR PHONE! Sam needs to know you're still here!!!
no subject
Date: 2020-11-10 06:38 pm (UTC)And yes, Dean, ANSWER YOUR PHONE.
no subject
Date: 2020-11-08 03:02 pm (UTC)OK, diving in to a point. I read all the comments on here and there were some pretty much more elaborate explanations of my thoughts than I could manage right now, so I'll try and concentrate on what my actual beef was with this episode (and in truth, probably the rest of the finale) in a way I haven't seen articulated yet.
Before I go off, though, here's a present for you caranfindel, in case you haven't seen it yet. I thought of you the moment I did and I think no one could appreciate this level of nerdery more:
OK.... comment was too long again, will break it up in two parts again.
(so here, just a couple of things re: review - the whiskey scene. SAME. Eileen's car keys - weren't they lying on the pavement next to her phone? Sam and Jack at the gas station - to me that was just Sam seeing Jack vanishing into his own head and being a good dad by giving him something to do instead... Spidey!Donna and the Winchester: Endgame - WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT, I AM SO NOT OVER THAT YET)
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Date: 2020-11-10 06:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-10 07:45 pm (UTC)Ok, said it was only two comments, but actually...
Date: 2020-11-08 03:04 pm (UTC)It's ok if you pitch all the vast forces of the universe - God, the Darkness, Death, the Empty etc etc. - against the boys, but please, if they're going not to get instantly squashed like the fricking ants they are to these entities, give those antagonists a sufficient reason to hold off from just snapping them out of existence. Chuck, I get, he's just a sadist who wants to watch them bleed out slowly. The Empty just wants to be left alone, ok sure, Death though, why the fuck is she fighting them Darth-Vader style, is it because she can't actually interfere actively, TELL us what are the RULES?
And of course the Winchesters can't do anything but run around impotently and do things that are not going to make a difference and are not going to matter, but instead of mounting the tension and making me care about all those beloved people coming back before their send off, I just sit there and feel... nothing.
Except like, there's two episodes left and I ask myself, what are they going to do with that much time, which is decidedly not the kind of despair I should be feeling right now. Maybe it's just me, maybe I'm just burnt out on all the real world drama going on right now, but I sat through 35 mins of this episode, and I couldn't bring myself to care and I resent that by a magnitude of 1000.
Do I know what to do with that? Nope, I don't. The momentum has stalled and I have no confidence in the writers of the last remaining episodes to get it back. Do I think they still have a chance though? Always, hope springs eternal.
Ok, but this is the last one, I think.
Date: 2020-11-08 03:05 pm (UTC)Don't know what to tell you, did I sit there and go - oh ... oh no ... oh are they going to kiss? Please don't. And ... oh... uhhh... 'what I want I can never have?' what's that supposed to mean? That does not make sense at all. And... oh... uhm, wow, Dean's face. Supremely awkard, oh my god, I'm cringing just looking at him. And... wow, Cas said, I love you, he actually said it, out loud, shippers will die from spontaneous panty combustion.
That were all thoughts that went through my head as I watched. And yet... yet, it moved me.
Like, made me care and feel for Cas in a way that I don't think I've ever connected to his character before. It felt like the most obvious and most logical conclusion of his character arc and like he's the one who's now traveled the most complete journey of all of them. And I kinda loved that?
Maybe it was over the top, but the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. But to me, when Cas said 'something I can never have' he wasn't talking about reciprocation of romantic love from Dean, he was talking about his humanity. Because for all that Cas has fought and clawed his way into a deep understanding of humans, to free will, to making a life for himself and choices that defy the borders of the divine order, has felt things he wasn't created to feel, he is still in his very meta-physical make-up always going to be very different. Probably as close as an angel has ever come to being and experiencing true humanity. But never actually fully human.
And when he says that he loves Dean, I find that profoundly humbling and authentic, because to me, it didn't read not as a declaration of a mere romantic love, but something infinitely more vast and complicated than that, even bigger than family or friendship or all of it combined. Cas may have forged connections with other people, learned a lot from different relationships along the way, but Dean was the focal point, the thing that made him want to start so it makes a weird kind of sense that he'd be the one Cas projects all of this on (and btw, I think he's right about Dean being ultimately motivated by love. Not always the same kind of love, and certainly not all of them healthy, which leads to disaster as much as salvation and therefore in my mind, doesn't divorce that notion from the fact that Dean is and stays deeply flawed, despite Cas idealizing him in the moment). But ultimately, his fullfillment didn't involve Dean and his participation at all, because it was about realization. About the knowledge of oneself (yep, in the very biblical sense) and the fact that in order to gain true happiness, he didn't need to have something, he just needed to be happy. And to realize that and then be able to use it to save someone you love, with no regrets, that's.. whoa, somehow really moving to me. I'm tearing up just thinking about it.
So through all the distraction and the cringe and the over the top pathos and the meta, that was... a truly beautiful moment to me.
Idek. If any of that even made sense at all. But if we could have that same thing for Sam and Dean (TOGETHER DAMNIT, CAUSE DUH) I think I would very much be alright. Please and thank you.
Re: Ok, but this is the last one, I think.
Date: 2020-11-10 06:43 pm (UTC)Re: Ok, but this is the last one, I think.
Date: 2020-11-10 07:55 pm (UTC)And yes bigger picture is the clue. I'm currently reading the non-fiction publication 'The Heroine's Journey' by Gail Carrier (a must read for any writing meta fan) and she also references theme and message and how important they are (and the writer's awareness and conscious application of them) for the narrative to work. I feel like the writers on SPN have been bogged down in the logistics of how to wrap up the show to the point of losing sight of giving meaning to the ending. Sigh. Let's hope the boys get some passable material to act the he'll out of that last leg and bring this home ×wibbles×
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Date: 2020-11-09 05:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-10 06:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-10 11:41 pm (UTC)I admit, I cried during the final scene between Dean and Cas, even though as the same time I knew it was fanservice. Apparently Berens pitched it last year and was overjoyed that the show went ahead with it. Misha has said for Cas it was romantic love (no shit) and for Dean it was friendship love. The over the top monologue was fun to watch, as opposed to the wooden, frowning Cas who mostly looks bored. I've seen on Twitter that Destielers and Wincesters are involved in a duel to the death. I'm not in that Twitter stream so I only hear it second-hand, THANK GOD. But the "you're the most loving person in the world" is just a flip-flop from the usual "you're broken/you're empty/you're dead inside" that we get every goddamn season. Somehow I don't think Dean is that loving. How come nobody talks that way to Sam? He's loving, and vulnerable, and needy and I'd better stop there before I punch somebody.
I remember how gutted I was by the S8 finale, with the angels falling, Sam dying, Cas being human. The show really took a nosedive after that, even though S9 gave us Metatron, whom I adored. Come to think of it, God was still not around when Metatron was taunting Dean. That's the God I want. Just. Not. There.
To me, the show is throwing everything at the wall and seeing what sticks. Problem, nothing's sticking. As mangacat said, what's the point of having all of these powerful forces not just killing the Winchesters? I mean, are they cockroaches? Having so many of them means I don't care about any of them. I'm just sitting there going, "okay, it's officially the cartoon version of Supernatural". I really hate the whole Chuck plot. As I've said earlier, it ruins the earlier seasons where God was an absent father and we were left with absolute nihilism. Which I dug. Plus, heaven being nature and bars and rooms in houses, instead of a Japanese oil company. It's like when Crowley had a beautiful office in S8, then for the rest of the time he was in a huge men's room. Then they redo Hell, and they make Rowena's death meaningless (speaking of, do you think she's going to show up and save the guys?). This show is amazingly good at undercutting itself.
I adore Jack, but I agree, he's not a core part of the family. I'm kind of amazed that I didn't feel much when Cas sacrificed himself. Part of it was I was semi-spoiled, but also I really didn't give much of a shit. I pretty much feel that way overall.
WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A BUCKLEMING EPISODE? KILL ME NOW.
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Date: 2020-11-09 02:12 pm (UTC)~bangs gavel~
I realize that's not super thoughtful but I haven't been able to gather my entire reaction yet. I just need to believe it was a platonic I love you.
I don't mind Destiel in fanfic, I guess, but that's fanfic. I write a ton of Wincest but I don't want anyone to put it in the show.
Next week probably will be Jack's week. I'm totally with you in that he's not one of them. I adore him as a character, but. It's not the same. He doesn't get to slide in at season 13 and save the world.
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Date: 2020-11-10 06:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-14 01:21 pm (UTC)I dunno, it's still kinda the Saturday morning matinee where the stagecoach goes over the mountain at the end of the movie but, next week, the replay shows you the cowboy jumping out of the stagecoach just before it went over.
> Anyway. Dean says it's open season on anyone from another world (aw, sorry, Winchesters in Brazil), anyone who came back from the dead, and Sam gets a horrified look on his face and says "Eileen."
And Charlie says, "Hey, I'm from an AU and I'm on the hit list but by all means go chase after your girlfriend and leave me here to die."
> She asks what the plan is, and Sam bends down creepily to look at Jack in the passenger seat
I read that differently. I thought he was looking at him with concern because Jack was all up in his head and feeling desperate, so Sam asked him to drive to give him something to do that would make him focus.
>
Back at the silo. I've decided it must be mostly underground and isn't a grain silo like I thought. So what kind of silo do Yankees have that's mostly underground?
Missile silo, maybe?
> I mean, it was already so badly written that one could argue Cas wasn't proclaiming romantic love
Badly written, or deliberately written that way? o_O